Part 1: The Idea (aka The Funny Part)

"Sounds like a pretty lonely life."

      "No."

"Feel free to call anytime."

"Rejected."

"Suicide? I strongly disapprove of suicide."

"You and me both. Next."

"Take me now Wolfwood!"

"What? That's not one of your quotes!"

"I disagree."

"Well, not an official one."

"True enough."

"I refuse to start a fanfic with that line."

"Hey, I'm only the muse. You're the one that picks out which ideas you actually write."

"If I could kill you, I swear I would."

"No you wouldn't. Im the closest thing you have to a boyfriend."

"Who told you that?!?! Death will come to them on swift wings!!!!"

"I thought you disapproved of suicide."

"Oh, right. But youre not helping. Maybe I /should/ be consulting my Miroku-muse and not you."

"Horny little bastard."

"And you aren't?!?!"

"You can't judge me!!!!"

"Who said I was?!?"

"I thought you were."

"No..."

"Oh. Well, good! Cus you have no right!"

"WOLFWOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"You bellowed, my maiden?"

"Get your idiot boy toy outta here."

"Migraine already? Usually you tolerate him better than /me/."

"I'm sick today. And I have a specific idea, but he's not helping."

"Which is?"

"To start a lovey-dovey fanfic with you two, and to start it with one of the eppie quotes."

"Hmm. Thou shall not kill, remember?"

"OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Bye."

Actually, now that I think about it A really good Wolfwood POV could be made off of that quote. Damn it.

Part 2: The FanFic

            "Thou shall not kill, remember?!? What kind of church man are you?!?"

            Oh, Vash. If you knew what kind of church man I was, you'd probably kill me on the spot, despite your endless mantras. I'm the kind of church man that pretends to be your friend, while all the while being part of a twisted man's plan.

            Pull yourself together, Wolfwood. It's not like you're doing this on your own free will. They threatened the children. Your children. The children you've worked so hard to protect. And youre not just protecting Vash on Knives' orders anymore.

            Shut up, I tell at myself. Just shut up.

            I look at the man sleeping across the room from me. Sunrise will come soon, and he'll be up. The poor guy tries so hard to sleep in, but never can. It's like his body won't let him get any more than he really needs. At least his body lets him sleep.

            No, it's not my body. My mind. It won't turn off. I keep thinking all these things I shouldn't. I think about Vash, the girls, the fact that I'm really not on Knives' orders anymore. I really /do/ want to keep the chicken shit idiot safe.

            You really consider him a friend now, don't you? No, not a friend....  More than that.

            I had never really thought about a relationship with another man. Hell, I had never really thought about a relationship. I had the church, the children.... What more did I need? I had been happy there. More than happy. Then they found me.... Bastards. But I had been a fool to think that they wouldn't. Those poor kids.... If /they/ knew what kind of church man I was.... I pray to God they never do. They've been through enough.

            There's a faint glow on the horizon now. Vash will up soon. He's a grumpy little jerk in the morning. Talk about needing your morning coffee. Actually, morning doughnut, in this case.

            I end up smiling to myself at the thought. Vash didn't even take crap from Meryl before his morning coffee and doughnuts. Or perhaps he just uses grumpiness as an excuse to ward her off in a sudden surge back-off-bitch.

            He's starting to stretch under the sheets.  Planet Gunsmoke, duck and cover. Vash the Stampede has awoken to you once more.